Silent words

I, didn’t like the feelings
of being constantly reminded
that you are not mine, or
that you and I do not belong together, or
that you are you and I am me, which means there are no overlappings between us,
or something along that line.

I, didn’t like being slapped in the face,
every so often.
I, didn’t like being so vulnerable.
I wish I could turn a deaf ear,
or have a heart made of stone.
So that every time this happens,
my heart wouldn’t tremble so vigorously.
But I couldn’t help it,
because I care.

I, didn’t like the feelings
of being an outcast.
You, are the person, I never want to loose.
Instead of saying out loud,
I tell myself in silence.

That is me. That is who I am.
You don’t hear me,
because I keep them deep within.
I protested,
I hate us going separate ways.
But I protested in silence.
I feel like a kid, whose toys were taken away from her, and all she did is watch in silence.

Oh how I wish I could speak.

I wish you could hear…these silent words.